Take A Deep Breath

So the first week of the tournament's over. Time to regroup and assess what happened this weekend. Tar Heels rout? Check. Tar Heels gut-check? Hip-check. Bracket fucked? Triple check. This week's outlook? Chalk.

The Heels plan to leave the friendly confines of the Greensboro Coliseum (did you think the dookies cheering against Tyler would make him play worse?) and head for Memphis, where 4th seeded Gonzaga awaits, possibly followed by either 3 seed Syracuse or 2 seed Oklahoma. The road seems treacherous. Everyone and their mentally-impaired (yet perfectly functional with a keyboard) brother will be talking and chatting and blogging this week about the pitfalls that await Roy's boys.

Don't listen to them.

Don't listen to me, either, for that matter- the point of this blog is that three restless Heels fans with access to the internet can report on their favorite team about as well as the well-connected sports press. We're biased and we say things to make ourselves feel better (or worse, Alex) because that's what people do when the stakes are high and they have to wait four more days for the fucking game.

But I digress- don't listen to anybody. The Tar Heels are in the Sweet Sixteen. If they play as well as they did against LSU and Radford, they've got four more games and a bunch of nets to cut down. If they play as well as they did against Maryland back in February... I'm not going to finish that thought. We all know what will happen.

But even that won't happen until Friday night. Between now and then, the Heels are still one of the best teams in the country with a shot to be THE best. That's all we know for sure. Everything else, the buzzing and commentating, is speculation. It's the same type of speculation that created $4/gallon gas last summer. It's the type of speculation that is spouted profusely because it's supposed make the game more exciting. It's the type of speculation that won't hold up in a court of law.

This will: for the next four days, the Heels are invincible. They will not lose. The Zags can't beat them, though if they tried, they'd need better columns than a State fan could write to have any chance. This won't cut it.

So take a deep breath. Catch up on the shows you DVRed. Sleep soundly every night. And save all your anxious energy for the things that really affect the outcome of the game: superstitions and screaming at the TV.

Maybe this picture of Erin Andrews showing her true colors will help you relax.